Saturday, 10 August 2013
When you recognise your own shortcomings, it can be quite daunting to deal with the task of being extremely honest with yourself and making room to change certain behaviours that no longer serve you. Resistance to letting go of learned reactions keeps us stuck in a pattern that restricts our growth into the person that we are destined to become.
We justify our behaviours by blaming someone else, stating it is the "other person's" fault that we are like this, that they cause you to react in the way that you do, that ultimately YOU are not responsible for your own behaviours but circumstance and everything other than yourself is the cause of your discomfort.
All of these elements of resistance are clear signs that literally scream, it is not them it is YOU! Why are we so unwilling to take responsibility for our own actions, our own feelings of discomfort and be truly honest with how we interact with others? In the Course in Miracles, it states "would you rather be happy or right." This does not mean that you allow others to take advantage of your own personal boundaries, it just means that you recognise that any stance that makes you feel that you are right and the other person is wrong, is a wakeup call that you need to exercise more compassion towards others in regards to their own spiritual journey as well as to your own.
There are times when my irritation of others behaviours ignite me from a calm blue light into a raging inferno in a matter of seconds. I do eventually talk myself out of my rage and calm down usually within the hour but I had to look closely at my own behaviour and pinpoint what causes me to react in such a way.
In the book The Handbook to Higher Consciousness by Ken Keyes Jnr, he lists twelve pathways of which you memorise to help you diffuse your reactions to others and bring the responsibility back to yourself:
"I take full responsibility here and now for everything I experience,
for it is my own programming that creates my actions
and also influences the reactions of people around me."
This statement allows you to recognise that it is our own learned habitual behaviours that create our actions and causes reactions in others. It reminds you to be responsible for how you react around others, however uncomfortable it may feel, and always try to take the higher road in everything that you do.
So this weekend, take courage in looking at your own short-comings and practice at least once today to change your reaction to a situation to one that does not puff you up, but allows you to give space to yourself and others to flow rather than resist.
Have a blessed weekend.